Monday, January 14, 2019

We Are More Than Just Parents

"If you do not love yourself, well, you cannot do anything well, that's my philosophy."

~ Nawal El Saadawai





Frequently lately, I have come to realize, that I have come lost in the life of motherhood.  I am proud and overjoyed in all that my children are but at some point I began to lose myself.  To be honest, I never realized that it was happening till all of my life became about was caring for my house and raising respectful, kind children.

Being a parent is an amazing piece of me but that should not negate all aspects of me.  I am more than just a mother, I have dreams and aspirations for myself as well as for my family.  It is entirely possible to find yourself again.  It is important for our children to see more pieces of who we are and that we are also striving to maintain our health and personal well being as well as theirs.  

There are general ways in which we can go and find a piece of ourselves again  

  • Find new ways to connect with old friends
  • Discover a new or old hobby
  • Ask for help from friends or family
  • Take care of yourself physically

Our children are very perceptive and see more than we realize and who we are plays a huge role within them.  Don't forget who you are and take time each day to care for yourself as well as theirs.

Remember that it is not selfish to take time for yourself, it is important for our emotional, physical and mental well being.   

Life will never be who you were before kids but you can and should fi
nd yourself again and love who that person is today.


20 comments:

  1. With my first 2 children I never focused on me. It was my career and my kids and I gained weight and was unhappy. By the time number 3 came I learned the importance of self preservation!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I feel this way sometimes too! It is good to take some "me time" to do what you enjoy and to pamper yourself.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I definitely agree it is really important to not forget to make time for ourselves,because someone who doesn't love himself can't give love to anyone else.

    ReplyDelete
  4. So incredibly relatable! Thanks for sharing!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Great Tips. As parents we should always have time for ourselves too.

    ReplyDelete
  6. This is such a great post that I feel that many parents would benefit from reading. It is so easy to give up self-care for the sake of children. However, you teaching them that self-care is important is so huge for their future and your current sanity!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I've experienced this! I had three babies back to back. I was a full time student. I had a husband who was struggling with health issues. I felt like I was in survival mode many times. I wrote a blog post about "losing yourself" actually. Last year, I had some extra stressful things happen in life and I decided to start spending more time taking care of myself. I realized that taking the time to take care of myself more actually HELPED me be more productive at home and it HELPED me be more patient with my children. I'm actually in the process of updating some things on my blog and making it more of a "reinvent yourself" blog where people can come for ideas on how to make themselves over mentally, physically, emotionally etc. I'm excited to try to help others experiencing this!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Never forget about your own needs, and never stop meeting your own needs - nothing is more important than that.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I remember my mom once saying that going to the gym was her "me time." I didn't realize how important that was for her until I was older.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I don't have any children but that was a very interesting read!

    ReplyDelete
  11. My friend said many of the same things when she became a mother. It's hard to remember to take time for yourself! I'm going to send this to her for inspiration!

    ReplyDelete
  12. I remember this time when our kids (2 years difference) were younger. sometime it was really hard. then we organized to have more time for us and that changed our life with the little ones. Irotchka

    ReplyDelete
  13. Finding time for yourself is the most important thing. I'm not a mother but i have many friends who are parents and they all found this as an issue when they became parents, so I'm glad you managed to find time for yourself.

    ReplyDelete
  14. great article. I'd definitely bookmark this one. Hope to find more like this.

    ReplyDelete
  15. One of things that scares me about having children is losing the 'me' time. This is a great article to put those worries to bed.

    ReplyDelete
  16. I' am not a parent yet but your quote reminds me that we need to love and take care ourselves. wonderful post

    ReplyDelete
  17. I don't have children yet but I do feel like I lose myself sometimes. Like a identity crisis. I feel like it's a life changing experience when u become a mother cuz you're responsible for another human being!

    ReplyDelete
  18. You know Nawal El Saadawi!? She is one of my favorite authors. Yes, parenting demands a lot from us and we must learn to make time for our own self care.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Your post reminds me of Charlotte in Sex and the City. She loves motherhood, but starting to hate losing herself. She found a way when she travel with her friends and came back refreshed.

    ReplyDelete
  20. It is very important to take care of ourselves too.

    ReplyDelete

Weakness Does Not Make You Frail

"Growth begins when we begin to accept our own weakness." ~ Jean Vanier Weakness...why does it sound like such an ugly ...